Saturday, April 23, 2016


“How did it get so late so soon? It's night before it's afternoon. December is here before it's June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon?” -- Dr. Seuss

I love doing SSL.  Each issue begins with scribbled notes to myself and a list of links on a page or two of an Open Office text document, and a folder of photographs I've downloaded and saved.  I never know how I am going to manage even 12 or 14 or 22 pages.

And then page by page it emerges.  No matter how clearly I see it in my head, it is filled with surprises.  I find more and more that I want to add.  It is draining and exhausting, and I while I am thrilled to watch it emerge, I am also usually disappointed at how short it falls from my dream of what it could be, if only I had the proper tools and plenty of time.

Since Easter I have been dealing with a health issue, an impending move at the end of April - tomorrow, actually- and a return to the buses as I prepare to take my van to her final resting place in the salvage yard where she will be cannibalised.

My laptop, where all the work of SSL, and many other things, occurs, is a 5 year old Toshiba that I bought new for $200 at Microcenter.  The computer is fairing better than the van, but I do so much downloading that I am having problems with it.  I worry that the processor is going to go before I can get a new one.

And then there is the shitstorm that is 2016, as humanity collectively overthrows the Old Piscean Age and institutions and inequality and imbalance, and leaders, the Ascended Masters like Bowie and Prince truly ascend, leaving a void in the chaos.

None of this conducive to the labour intensive work of my little 'zine, even though I love it, and also that my spirits tell me that it is indeed important, even if there is not much visible support for it.

In sum, I have no idea when I will be able to finish the Special Supplement with the interview with Jesus, or the April full moon issue.  I hope if you enjoy this 'zine you will not abandon it, or me.  I have so few resources right now, and while I hope that this week I will be able to work on it and get at least the current issue done by next weekend, I may not be able to.

Just know that I can't wait for it to come out, and that I think about it all the time.  Not just the next issue in the Google Doc format, but how to get the money to build a website, how to get the proper permissions for photos, how to get the money to print ads for it, and hopefully one day have the whole 'zine printed for distribution.

Right now all I can do is dream about it though.  Because my health, my stability, my ability to function in this world, is taking all my energy.  And even when I have free time, I am so drained that I end up binge watching netflix, or re-posting excessively on facebook, or just staring at the sights of spring in St. Louis.

(There is also my life as a political activist, and I am also feeling the same pull to do those activities, which I am also not managing very well.  It may be that when I do have energy, I will choose to immerse myself in the shared reality.  The global consciousness shift is taking place, and there are many movements and uprisings, but from what I am seeing with my Third Eye much more needs to happen.  Much, much more.)

So I hope there will be a new issue soon. And I hope you will be waiting for it, no matter how long it takes me to finish it.

Thursday, April 21, 2016


Prince is dead.  I am still not over David Bowie.

Prince died on a Thursday, ruled by Jupiter, and the colour of the day is purple.  I don't think that means anything.  It was just something I was thinking about.

Rain-Bowie's and Purple Rain. These are the omens of the apocalypse, not those locusts and whores-men from the book of "revelations."

Are these deaths Ascended Masters releasing their Old Piscean Age personas so they can reincarnate, as the spirits said at Samhain many would be doing this year?

Or is this some Evil/Archon/Illuminati/El bullshit to delay the shift or drive all of us into utter despair?

Yesterday's energy was SO off, as detailed in my last post.  I know the shitstorm is here.  I have been seeing and feeling it in glimpses for the last 8 or 10 years.  But I didn't see Bowie's death- he was immortal, he was gonna live forever as a God.  And Prince?  He is a force of nature.  If he is gone I want to believe it is because it was his time and his Higher Self knew it.  Not that he was sucked into the bad energy of the shitstorm.

I was going to make some Mercury retrograde charms yesterday and do my rite for Iris.  I didn't have time or energy after the day of riding buses and driving cars, and watching traffic accidents and people behaving oddly.

Now I am wondering if what I need to is make a bunch of  "musicians I can't live without" charms and send them out in fan mail, hoping they reach their destination, and hoping that my power and love is strong enough.

I know that the Old Age has to go, and that part of that will be souls that will transition.  But the world feels very empty right now.

As with Bowie, I probably won't be able to listen to Prince for at least another few days-- I mean, where I purposely seek out his music.  Not just hearing it from everywhere I go- from cars, in stores, etc.

Rest in Power, Prince.  Thank you for all you gave the world.  I am glad I walked this earth for 50 years with you upon it.

Astrologer Zell Bodine on Prince's death, with his natal chart.

This is the link to the earlier post she references.

Prince's Freddie Gray tribute

Prince inspired two generations (just while he was alive) to be the weirdo's that they wanted to be

PS- IronicallyTony Visconti who is on tour with his Bowie Tribute band posted a "rain-Bowie" he saw last night in Arizona... I am hope the Goddess Iris gives Prince a Purple rainbow over Minneapolis.  There are massive spirit orbs in this photo:

Wednesday, April 20, 2016


A magickal somebody said to me the other day "it doesn't seem like anything is happening, everything is just spinning around and around".   In the eye of the storm there is calm.  Everything is just whirling and whirling around you, but other than the occasional spatter, there is actually a feeling of being frozen, out of touch, stagnant, and perhaps for some, isolated.

The shitstorm is not just the collapse of the Old Age structures and the chaos and revolutions and wars and clash of civilisations, it is also natural disasters, and accidents.

People associate traffic and other accidents with Mercury "retrograde" fuzziness.  But it is Mars that rules accidents.  (And wars, of course, and explosions, and animals-- including strange animal behaviours and attacks.)

For the last week I have been hearing about accidents from other people.  But I am not driving much these days-- after acquiring a car again after many years, a vehicle which needed a lot of repairs, and finally became too much for me-- I am mostly back on public transit.

At 4:20 today I was buying gas, and I realised it was 420.  Today was definitely NOT a celebratory, laid back, trippy holiday for me.  It was a day of bus and car trips.  And traffic accidents. I passed three very serious accidents on highways.  By serious I mean all the lanes shut down, multiple ambulances, fire trucks, and flatbed towing trucks.  Luckily these were always on the other side of the highway.  I only had to slow because of all the looky-loos.

And today was one of the few days when I got stuck in real traffic.  By real, I mean "worthy of Los Angeles", however, this was just the usual, badly, timed MODOT "road work during rush hour".  It was however, enough, to make me get off the freeway early, and take an unusual route.

But the worse thing I saw was an accident involving a pedestrian.  A guy hit a woman crossing at a crosswalk, and then drove forward, basically hitting her again.  I admit I thought the worst of him, that he was trying to get away, but afterward I think maybe he just hit the gas in shock.  Either way, the woman is looking at a broken leg, at least.  And it was very upsetting for me to witness it.

I've been searching the news for the accidents I saw today and I think only one on them was listed.  I can't be sure from the time they reported or from the photos.  The flip side of "fuzziness" is the road and "roid" rage.  The shooting at Wash. U. might have been road rage.

A lot of people in St. Louis seem like they are on auto-pilot to me.  Too many people here go in circles day after day, so familiar with their routine that they don't really see it. I know that accidents happen everywhere.  And I have seen bad accidents in Los Angeles and other places, too.  But what I saw today, and what I have been hearing from other people the last few days, the fuzzy factor is out of control.

The whole planet is out of balance, tipping on it's side.  We are out of balance economically, spiritually/ethically, ecologically, and in so many other ways.  Even being aware is not enough. New Age and Magickal peeps might not be able to wear blinders right now.  Intense focus with constant peripheral awareness is needed right now.

We are Witness to the collapse, at best.  At worst we ourselves are hit with the falling debris.  Count your blessings.  As disturbing as today was for me, it was not deadly or devastating.  I am sad though, for things that I saw today, both with my eyes and with my Third Eye.

I console myself with Democracy Spring.  The good side of the collapse.

EDIT: Democracy Spring gives me hope because of the uprising of people who want change, NOT because of all the arrests.  PLEASE PLEASE don't just take the plea and pay the fine.  PLEASE challenge these arrests in court.

Sunday, April 10, 2016


I will be at the Haunt's monthly astrology party tonight from 4-8 PM reading tarot cards and hanging out.

5000 Alaska, Dutchtown.

Friday, April 1, 2016


Not only is this one 36 pages again, I actually cut out a big chunk that will be a special edition later this month.  Because of all the waiting for Jesus and not formatting, this one looks rough, but it is still good.  Much more 'zine looking than the other three.